Gone Too Soon

Yesterday, we celebrated the May Birthdays at my Gammy's house, and even though it has only been Karli and I celebrating for a few years, yesterday, it hit me worse than normal that Jesse wasn't with Karli and I to celebrate like we always had.

 

I can still remember where I was and how I found out that we lost Jesse, who was like a second brother to me.  He moved into our house when I went to college and since our families were inseparable, it was like there were two older kids, Drew and I, two middle kids, Eric and Jesse, and then two youngest kids, Karli and Meghan.

 

Since his 24th Birthday was yesterday, I thought I'd share some of my favorite pictures since you know that pictures are so meaningful for me.  I truly think a picture is worth a thousand words, especially when a precious life is cut short.

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Jesse (left) and Eric (right)

Born less than a month apart

April 23 and May 19, 1989

 

Devious laugh

 

Stevie and I with Baby Jesse

 

 Jesse and Eric getting bigger

 

 The birthday boy

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 Jesse, Eric and Daniel

November, 1996

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Jesse and I

Before Homecoming 2005

 

 When we made the boys dinner before the dance

Homecoming 2005

 

Jon, Eric and Jesse

 Homecoming 2005

 

 Jesse with our little cousin, Ethan

Christmas 2005

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Karli, Me, Jesse and Eric

 April and May Birthdays 2006

 

Jesse, Eric and Nick

Ocean City, Maryland Trip- September 2006

 

Jesse and I

Ocean City, Maryland Trip- September 2006

 

Jesse, Eric and Nick

Ocean City, Maryland Trip- September 2006



 

Karli, Jesse, Me, Eric, Stevie and Nick

Ocean City, Maryland Trip- September 2006

 

 High quality lamps at the Rivadirchy

Ocean City, Maryland Trip- September 2006

 

 The sweet, up to date phone at the Rivadirchy

Ocean City, Maryland Trip- September 2006

 

 The Rivadirchy's Matching Patterns...

Ocean City, Maryland Trip- September 2006

 

 

 Eric and Jesse

Christmas 2006

 

 Eric, Daniel, Jesse and Karli

Christmas 2006

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One of our favorites

 

Another one of our favorites

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I hope you spent your 24th birthday dancing with the angels, Jesse!!  We miss you like crazy!!!

 

Peace Out! 

Happy Birthday, Sweet Angel

Today is pretty bittersweet for me.  It is Kadence's 7th Birthday, and while she's in much less pain celebrating in Heaven, it's harder for us left behind.  I have spent many nights looking through old pictures, but today the specific pictures from her 6th birthday are even more special!  We celebrated in a room at the hospital that Felicia arranged, and she went all out.  

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Some of my students made this sign to hang up at the party.  All of them made birthday cards for her, which was totally their own idea.

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The cake was delicious, Felicia got a strawberry cake since strawberries were Kader's favorite!

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 I made a ton of cupcakes, which were a big hit too.

 

 

 

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This has to be one of my favorite pictures from that day, such a cutie!!

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Then she got tons and tons of gifts.  This one specifically was a life-sized cut out of Justin Bieber, who again was the favorite, hands down!

Us and her other Aunt and Uncle all went together and got her a Kindle Fire, which she loved and used all the time after she got it!

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Kadence and her beautiful Mommy

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Afterwards back in her room, she opened a gift from one of my coworkers and her daughters, and also wrote thank you notes for the gifts.

 

 

 

 

 

 What a great day that we will cherish forever.  

I know she is even happier celebrating her birthday up in Heaven this year!

One Word

If you asked someone that knows me to describe me in one word, I am sure the words would vary, but most of them would be positive words.  Maybe words like stubborn from my husband, but most would say compassionate, caring, giving, loving, etc.

 

One you would probably have a .0000001% chance of hearing the word "terrible."  While it could be considered rare, it was used on me last night.  I was called terrible by someone who I bought outfits for her unborn daughter, bought her gifts for her baby shower, got a necklace for her engraved with her daughter's name and birthstone on it, and even sent money when she couldn't afford to eat when in the hospital with her daughter... all when never having met this person in real life.  Ironic huh?!? 

 

But the point of this post isn't to cut down others.  Instead, I will pray for her and hope that someday she'll grow up and realize that she took many things for granted.  I can pray that this verse helps her, since it's been replaying in my head today:

 

Turn my heart toward your statutes and not toward selfish gain.

-Psalm 119:36

 

One of the most frustrating things are when people let you down.  But during this whole process, I have realized who my true friends are.  When a random person who doesn't even knows you past a computer attacks you, it's amazing how many friends stand up for you, whether you've talked recently or not.

 

So today, I ask you to help me pray for this young lady and also to share in my thankfulness of these friends, who obviously have my back!

 

I love all of you!!!

Happy Mother's Day!!

A few weeks ago, a photographer that I went to high school with, Laura Lynn Photography held a contest where she was going to give away a mini-session to one person, who wrote an entry about their Mom.  I wasn't sure I was going to be able to write an entry without completely breaking down (which of course happened) but I entered, and the entry won!!!  I'm so excited to tell my Mom, because all she's wanted for the longest time has been updated pictures of the family.

 

 

So, since it's Mother's Day, I thought I'd share the entry I wrote about my Mom:

I have always heard that a girls best friend will be their Mom. I have had the most supportive parents a girl could ask for, but growing up, I was definitely mean to her, and she didn't deserve it at all.  Now that I have grown up, I wonder how she put up with my teenage attitude and didn't lose faith in me, while remaining my biggest fan. Call it hormones, call it stupidity, call it both, she did not deserve to be treated the way I treated her as a teenager. I got so wrapped up in friends and bring able to go places that when she said no or gave me a punishment, I could not see the bigger picture, I was stuck in the moment.

I am not sure how I got so lucky, but both of my parents are my best friends. I talk to them on a regular basis, and I value their opinions like gold. My Mom has become the one person who knows everything about me, and loves me anyway. She celebrates the successes with me, and helps pull me through the struggles.

I went through one of the biggest struggles of my life this past August, and I still struggle with it on a daily basis.  I am constantly battling with myself over why God would take such a precious angel from both me and my family, and I can hardly see through my tears while writing this because it is so fresh. I cannot wait to be a Mother, but having a niece was just as much of a blessing for me; we had an inseparable bond. I was in a very dark place when we lost her, and I still have many bad days where I need guidance. My Mom has been there through the whole process and whether it is sitting with me while I cry, or helping by making a crock pot full of soup and having it ready when we spent so many late nights at the hospital, I know for a fact that I get my huge heart from her.

My Mom is hands down the most caring, compassionate, giving person that I have the privilege of not only knowing, but loving unconditionally!  Whether it is volunteering with the youth group at our church, going on a Missions Trip to Guatemala to help clean underprivileged children's teeth, helping at the food pantry, or or helping her own children, she doesn't even think twice about helping others. She hardly ever does anything for herself, and that is proven when I say when I got her a gift certificate for a manicure a few years ago, it was the first time she had gotten one. She really doesn't ever do things for herself. She is always busy helping other people that she forgets to do something for herself or have "me" time. Whether it is buying one of her children something as a surprise, or supporting us at our events and interests, she is our number one fan. She deserves to know that we as children are her number one fans!!!!!

When I am blessed enough to someday become a mother, if I become half the mother that she is, I would be set for life. I am beyond lucky and so is everyone else who is fortunate enough to know her!!!

I love you, Mom and I can't wait to see you in a few hours to tell you the news, and give you your present!!!!

2-6

It's so easy to get wrapped up in the students who seem to ruin your day.  The ungrateful ones, the selfish ones, but what I really need to do is focus on the ones who brighten my day, and not the ones who take pride in ruining it.

Take today for example, I had some of the SWEETEST students who helped make today special.

From the sweet girl who brought in a chocolate cake with white icing

To the other sweet girl who brought in a cookie cake 
(she pays attention to what I say ;-))

To the girl and boy who brought all the snacky items and the boy who brought the plates and cups for my homeroom party

And finally the boy who calls me his Best Friend and gives me a sweet card

This year, I am going to try to focus on the positives instead of letting one or two small things affect me.  It's obviously so much more easy to let them ruin your day, but I will focus on the Kynslee, Gillian, Juliann, Hank, Sam and Pat's of the world <3